The shining candlelight, illuminated Lin Family’s main residence with a piece of bright light, this time, out of Lin Family’s three recommended competitors, there were actually two who both got in, what made people the most surprised was, the head of the Imperial kitchen Sir Manxi selected Wuniao as his personal little assistant.
What does this mean, ah, this means that ever since Lin Family Head retired from his position as the steward of the Imperial Kitchen, Lin Family finally has qualified successors to carry on the family business in the Imperial Kitchen, originally the Miao Family had gradually started to become dominant, which made the Lin Family Head’s heart grip with anxiousness until now, right now having finally sent off one’s own descendants, his heart blooms with great joy.
“Wuniao ah, daddy’s heart is very comforted, heard that Sir Manxi has never before accepted any person as his apprentice, this time accepted you as his little assistant, you must definitely work harder ah.” At this time, Lin Family Head suddenly had the mood of a compassionate father.
Lin Wuniao’s mouth twitched, isn’t it just the same as doing the role of a little OFFICE lady, what exactly is he getting all “happy” (tln: written as its English pronunciation) for? While on the topic of her entering the Imperial Palace, in reality it is a hundred times harmful and not even one advantage, could it be to allow her to assist Miao Manxi to cook instant noodles? This is also too embarrassing 囧
“My Lord, my Lord, bad news!” (tln: or “not good” meaning something bad has happened)
As Lin Family Head straightened, planning to resume his flowing speech expressing his thoughts as a loving father, his discourse was suddenly cut short by the housekeeper who raised his arms shouting, and he can’t help but glower into his eyes, “What are you being so urgent for?”
The housekeeper didn’t have time to wipe his sweat, his eyes facing Lin Wuniao, his eyes looking and then sweeping away again and again, he suddenly wailed bitterly, “My Lord, it’s not good, after Sir Manxi went home today after the competition he suddenly came down with illness.”
Lin Family Head’s eyes were incredulous, “He came down with illness, what ‘not good’ are you yelling about, it is bad luck!” (tln: he’s kind of saying that the housekeeping is cursing or jinxing him, like everything’s fine but right after someone says something bad will happen, something bad does happen; so it could also be “you’re courting disaster”)
The housekeeper replied, trembling with fear: “Sir Manxi is vomiting and has diarrhea, the Imperial physician rushed over, reportedly the cause of the sickness is eating stuff that’s gone bad.” His eyes glanced at Lin Wuniao and made things difficult for her.
Lin Wuniao despaired, she hopped towards a dark place, shoot, a major event has gone wrong, don’t tell me, this matter will be blamed on her head. (tln: Lin Wuniao’s kind of hiding in a dark corner right now trying to avoid the disaster)
“Go on.” Lin Family Head’s face shook, his eyes also started to glance at Wuniao.
“Reportedly……today Sir Manxi only tasted a small bite of the noodles that young lady cooked.”
!@#$%, she just knew this disaster was being pushed her way.
“Even so, you can’t say that it is Wuniao’s things which have a problem!” Lin Family Head’s face stiffened, his tone started to sound uncertain. (tln: or Lin Family Head’s face stopped smiling and started to look serious)
“But my Lord, after Nobleman Li returned home, he also came down with the same symptoms!”
Lin Wuniao timidly shifted towards the side of the hall, she started to thoroughly recall in detail, her own bowl of noodles that afternoon, and exactly what sort of problem came up. Firstly there was the poached egg that came flying over, golden in color and luster, there shouldn’t have been a problem with it.
Next up was the simmer-fried fish that flew over, logically speaking there also shouldn’t have been a problem with it.
As for that bag of instant noodles, it was even more so within the expiration date (‘best before’ date), how could there be an issue with it, she was too muddled up, she practically wanted to beat her fists on the ground and cry out in injustice ah.
“This wretched child, what should be done?” Lin Family Head finally started to lose his calm.
“Nobleman Li is easy to manage, just add some more silver taels, but as for Sir Manxi’s side, definitely cannot lose the qualifications to enter the Imperial Palace for no reason ah.” He urgently got up.
His whole face glared fiercely at Wuniao.
“You, carry a strip of thorns, go bring a bramble and beg for forgiveness!” The almighty Lin Family Head, suddenly had a bright idea, and ordered Lin Wuniao this way. (tln: a humble and earnest way of asking for forgiveness by proving one’s remorse through self-inflicted injury, hence the thorns)
No, don’t, tears started to well up in Wuniao’s eyes, she can’t accept that, she herself must really carry a bundle of firewood on her back to run along the roads to the Miao residence to make an exhibition of herself. (tln: “不要吧” could also be ‘it can’t be true’ or ‘can she please not have to do this?’; she doesn’t want to lose face/disgrace herself in public and in front of Miao Manxi)
“Might there be a better method.” She asked bashfully, but was oppressed into swallowing her words back by Lin Family Head’s explosive roar.
Fine then, she will attempt bringing a bramble and begging for forgiveness. (tln: Lin Wuniao doesn’t really understand this idiom of bring a bramble and begging for forgiveness; she thinks it is just carrying firewood, while Lin Family Head means something way more serious)
“Oh, that’s right, dress up prettier when you go.” Lin Family Head firmly believed, Miao Manxi had an extremely chivalric character, he would definitely accept (the apology). (tln: like how the knights of the middle ages had an honor code and would treat women and children better, Miao Manxi’s heart would/should soften towards Lin Wuniao, a (pretty) lady, and forgive her)
This time Lin Wuniao really shed tears.
What does it mean to dress up? Dressing up means a change so great as to upend the heavens and earth, look at her small face, before it might still have counted as clear and attractive, if she gets duped by Tang Xin like this (to do her makeup), (Tang Xin will) smear a thick layer of powder on everything, then as soon as she walks around, it (her face powder) will fall down in puffs and puffs (of powder).
“Wuniao, you must keep your face still, by all means do not move around, otherwise all the powder will fall off la.
Ah……choo……
Pardon me, she sneezed noisily, a great crack immediately appeared on the powder on her face, radiating towards the four cardinal directions.
“Ah……” The person screeching was Lin Family Head, he pounded the chair, roaring at the concubines who were standing in a circle and watching (tln: or just ‘spectating concubines’): “Hand over all your face powder to me, apply it nicely on Wuniao, apply until her face is fair and tender!”
Swoosh, Wuniao’s tears were silent and unceasing, streaked across her face, and ran down two deep, profound ravines of tears.
Is there any way it could be less horrendous than this?
By the time they finished applying powder, dressed her in a little peach pink gauze skirt, Lin Wuniao completely had no opinion, her head squeezed a total of 20 layers of big mountains, naturally that is the wigs that every branch’s concubine contributed out of friendly feelings, piled up this high, each connecting to another, just like the dung eggs that the Persian wild ass lugs around.
“Wu Nia, go then, use your good looks and intelligence, and conquer Sir Manxi!” Lin Family head slapped Lin Wuniao’s shoulder, everyone unanimously drew in a breath at the same time, “Lin Family Head’s (child), careful with the face powder!”
Puchi, Lin Wuniao lifted her head with great difficulty, lips as red as raging flames, awesomely shocking rouge like claps of thunder, in addition to white powder as thick as a wall, right now she had absolute justification, and could be positive that, Lin Family Head had sent her to threaten Miao Man Lou.
“Old ox, go get ten bundles of firewood from the firewood room, let Wuniao carry them over (to Miao Manxi)! This way Wuniao can demonstrate her sincerity!” Lin Family Head waved his hand, the gold ring on his fingers, dazzling the eyes of the multitude of concubines.
“……” Lin Wuniao couldn’t stop her tears from once again wetting her eyelashes.
Ten bundles of firewood, heavens, don’t tell her the reason for her time traveling here, was actually to be a porter (pack mule). She is not reconciled to this!